Summer is coming to a close, and for our kids, that means it’s back to school. You’ve likely heard moans and groans from your kids, but it can genuinely be an anxious time for many young people: New teachers, new schedules, maybe even a new school altogether. We have them well-prepped with new clothes and supplies, but as parents, we should focus on emotional preparation, too. For tips on dealing with back-to-school anxiety, we turned to OhioHealth clinical counselor Carrie Mateyko.
1. Develop a daily routine
Mateyko says children take comfort in routine, and sticking to a schedule can make things less frantic, especially when there’s plenty to remember. “Keeping a calendar for the week is a great idea. It helps avoid late-night recollections of work due the next day or forgetting to pack the right change of clothes for gym or other activities.” She says it also helps to prepare for the next day the night before. “Pack lunches in the evening, have them choose their outfits and set them out, and make sure you have permission slips signed and any money they might need for the day ahead.”
2. Get to bed on time
“For sleep recommendations, children ages 6-12 are suggested to have 9-12 hours, and teenagers ages 13-18 are suggested to have 8-10 hours of sleep,” says Mateyko. “Setting and keeping a regular bedtime ensures school-age kids get the quality sleep they need. It also makes waking on time easier and can limit the anxiety of a morning rush out the door.” She says it also helps to get into an evening routine that prepares your mind and body for sleep. “Give yourself an hour to relax. Use techniques like deep breathing and meditation, or even take a bath. About 30 minutes before bed, limit your use of technology, take a break from your phone and TV.”
3. Stay positive
“Remember that it’s natural for children and teens to have moments of anxiety,” says Mateyko. “As parents, it’s important for us to acknowledge these feelings — and the symptoms like stomach aches that can come with them — without judgment. Tell them it’s okay to be anxious sometimes. Remind them of times that they and you have faced similar problems and feelings and worked through them.” She also says it helps to positively visualize the day ahead. Even striking a Superman pose in your room for 30 seconds can help boost your confidence for the rest of the day.
4. Encourage Positive Behavior
“Pointing out any positive behavior is important. This will help reinforce the type of behavior that’s going to be beneficial for success. Praise helps let kids know you’re proud of them. In addition, telling them you’re proud of them allows them to feel better about themselves and promotes healthy self-esteem,” says Mateyko.
5. Find balance in diet and activity
“Daily exercise is important, but so is downtime,” says Mateyko. “Give yourself a moment to decompress after school, play around, have fun, and try not to overschedule yourself with extracurricular activities. She also recommends maintaining a healthy diet. “‘You are what you eat’ still rings true. If your body gets what it needs to stay healthy, it will help physically and emotionally.”
6. Communicate
“When kids know you’re truly listening and empathizing with them, it helps to relieve a lot of their stress,” says Mateyko. Let them know they can confide in you and do your best to understand their daily experience.
Even having family dinners, as challenging as that can be these days, creates a perfect atmosphere for discussing the day. “Playing a conversational game at dinner, such as ‘Bottoms Up, Bottoms Down,’ can promote open communication,” says Mateyko. “Each individual gets a turn to discuss the best and the worst parts of their day while other family members listen and acknowledge what they’re saying. If there is feedback to provide, it can be done after the family member shares. This is a good time for praise and to ask if there is anything they need you to do.”
